Greetings, dear readers, and Happy New Year from the gang here at my blog site. I hope the new year brings you all happiness, prosperity, and contentment. And gift receipts. I know I'll be using mine. Mom made us wear these ridiculous sweaters for our group picture.
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Dear Readers, There for a while I was very worried about Dorcas. Her post-Medicaid-appplication-coma persisted for some time. Gradually, however, she began to get better, though was still very fragile. But then Mom had to come along and ruin everything by talking about her dietary supplement. Now Dorcas has had a total relapse!
Dear Readers, Dorcas is having a hard time of it. The application for Medicaid has been especially traumatic. And very lengthy. See below. ...forty minutes later... ...and then there were all those terms and conditions... As a result, Dorcas has gone into some kind of post-Medicaid-application-coma. We could not pry the phone from her grip and had to cut the cord. We're very worried about her!
Dear Readers, My friend, Dorcas, the nerd duck princess, is one of those people who is losing her health insurance. See below for her adventure in the brave new world of healthcare reform. First, Dorcas got a cancellation notice in the mail. Figuring she better get a new plan before January 1, Dorcas dutifully followed the directions and called the appropriate phone number. As it turned out, Dorcas is one of those people who fall between the cracks. Being royalty, she doesn't really earn an income and, as such, actually qualifies for Medicaid. And that adventure is just beginning. Stay tuned.
Yes, dear readers, it's true. Dorcas, the nerd duck princess, has decided to embark on a modeling career. While she has not yet signed with an agency, below is a selection from her portfolio. Of course, she has my full support but - well - see for yourself. Dorcas in day wear. Dorcas in evening wear. ...beach wear... ...Goth... Ford Modeling Agency, here we come!
Dear Readers, You may have wondered where I have been lo' these many weeks. The truth is, dear readers, I have been on a journey of self discovery. I have traveled the country consulting various gurus and wise people and well - see below. First, I traveled to Colorado and consulted this guy.. Then, it was on to New Mexico to talk with this person. Finding these methods unsatisfactory, I visited a shrink. We even did those ink blot things. I have to say, after weeks of soul searching, I didn't find out much about myself that I didn't know already. A certain disaffection lingers. Gurus, travel, shrinks... eh... But then, there's always Mom's way. Truer words were never spoken!
Dear Readers, Mom wasn't too happy to learn that Dorcas got a new boyfriend. Mom always liked Dorcas. But then, I'm not so sure how great that relationship is going. Dorcas is giving the Scary Clown clarinet lessons. On top of it all, Zombie is trying to make it as a stand-up comic. I have weird friends...
Dear Readers,
You may remember that a while back Dorcas, the nerd duck princess, had a thing for me. Lately, however, she informs me that she has moved on. I was happy for her (and relieved) at first, but - uh - see below. Dear Readers, It's that time again. I visited with my accountant to make sure everything was in order. Happy Tax Day!
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AuthorI.V. Suckling is a vampire duck, department store salesperson, blood bank volunteer, and all round sophisticate. Archives
January 2014
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